Christian dating sleeping together

Mar 22, 9.

Christian perspective on sleeping in the same bed?

I've slept in the same bed with my fiance a few times - mostly when travelling, sometimes, like Melissa said, when we were depressed. We haven't had sex yet, and it's not because of a lack of attraction, but because we've decided we're not going to do it until we're married. It depends on your self control. While image does matter, I would also wonder why people even know whether you are sleeping in the same bed or not Mar 22, Mar 23, You're not going to find much in the Bible about this uniquely modern arrangement.

It's not a wise thing to do, I don't think, but you won't go to hell if you've done it a couple times, but I think there are very prudent reasons for not making a habit of it.

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As I said in my first post, I think it's a level of intimacy that isn't wise to indulge in outside of marriage. I think it's fallacious to always demand to see something in the Bible. The Bible is relatively silent on masturbation, lesbianism, launching nuclear weapons, and conservative politics, yet we're expected to come to a reasonable conclusion about all of them - not necessarily one that everybody would agree with, quite obviously.

Slow your roll, bro. Note how all four require significant levels of intellection beyond what is written right there in the Bible. Neither Orthodox nor Catholic churches give definitive answers on 3 and 4, so your response is off-base there. As for the other two, there are significant ranges of opinion throughout Christendom, my point is that asking "where in the Bible is it written This is also why I argued using a couple specific phrases - that it's "not wise" to indulge in some types of intimacy with somebody who is "not your spouse" rather than saying he's sinning.

Be true to thine own self.. Be true to the Lord.. Don't make excuses for your behavior nor for incidences.. Live with a clear and clean conscience.. Do these and you will do well in many other situations too. Mar 26, I'd want to sleep in the same bed with a GF that I was planning to marry. But then I don't see pre-marrital sex as a sin. As for what others think.. I think too many people try to be piolitally correct. I'm following Christ and not the people that want to gossip about my relationship. Mar 27, As someone who experiences occasionally extreme anxiety because of my academic life, I find it very good for my mental health to be near my significant other when I sleep.

I feel safer and warmer, I have fewer nightmares, and I am comforted by waking up knowing he's there. It's a very innocent enjoyment to genuinely appreciate just being close. He is a Christian, divorced, and in his forties. He met a Christian woman who seems to be an answer to prayer. Over time they have fallen in love and hope to get married eventually. Meanwhile they have started having sex together. Here is his question put another way: People make us feel guilty but at the same time, the Lord has blessed us and used us in some truly amazing ways.

The email says and I do not doubt that they have struggled with this issue. He says they are not just young adults looking for a free pass to have sex. For the first time they both feel they have found a partner that they love and enjoy in every way. There are many ways to answer that question. My own answer begins in a way that may surprise you, but I hope you will read through all the way to the end. I appreciate your forthrightness in writing so openly. Many people would not be as honest as you are. I thought a great deal about the question you raised and decided that I would answer you the same way I would answer an old friend.

Lori Hatcher

I want to shoot straight with you and say exactly what I would say if we were old and dear friends and had gone to high school together. Please know that I am not upset with you nor do I have a frown on my face. You have asked a good question that deserves an honest answer. If we were lifetime friends, I would say something like this: Odd place for me to begin, but it is undoubtedly true.

People assume that in some discreet way, having fallen in love, two people in their forties will have sex. I am not naive about this. I understand that Christian singles sometimes date and then have sex. Not that every Christian couple in your situation sleeps together, but it does happen. How do they even know? Do the two of you talk about it?

Christians Together : Unmarried Christians sleeping together

Fire in the fireplace is a good thing. Outside the fireplace, that same fire will burn down the house. And why would you take the time to justify yourself? God often speaks to us through the witness of the church. And it sounds as if the church—the great Christian church—has spoken through your friends who have made you feel guilty. Those are basically the rules we all have to follow. Not just the Bible rules, but the common rules of the Christian faith.

To be sure, lots of people break the rules but they remain in force. No Time to Mess Around But there is a deeper issue at work here. When I read your note, I was reminded of a book I read 25 years ago. It was a story about how many Jews in Romania were saved from the Holocaust by some Romanian friends who spirited them out of the country at great personal risk. Here is the part I recall most vividly.

The heroine of the book was a beautiful young woman, well placed in the country, a friend of powerful people, who took up the cause of the Jews as her own.

Time and again she risked everything to save them. Somewhere along the way she met and fell in love with a gallant young man who joined her in her mission.

They were nearly caught and captured again and again. It was clear that they were falling in love with each other. And on some level, you kept thinking they would sleep together. But they never did. And the reason given was something like this. They never slept together.

Not even one time. The cause they served captured all their attention, and they knew that they had no time to have sex. Yet it was immensely biblical. I thought of that book for the first time in many years when I read your note. Or you may think about it, but the higher calling will overrule your desires. There is a huge truth for you to consider. You and your lady friend have some important decisions to make.

As I said, I have spoken to you this way as if we were lifetime friends because among friends you can be blunt. The one problem that arose from us living together was out officiant. We both agreed that the most important thing about when where and how we were getting married was that we used a pastor as our officiant, that we be married with God as the center focus of the marriage. We asked my husbands uncle and three months before the wedding he called us and said it had been bothering him for a while and that he could not marry us. And God and none of my business.

I think that couples need to do what works for them.

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  • Christian perspective on sleeping in the same bed??

I have heard that religious leaders often disapprove of sleeping in the same bed if sex before marriage is counterindicated because of appearance sake. So if you are abstinant for religious reasons you might want to talk to your religious leader. That would be my Fiance and I! We live together and have for almost a year now, we sleep in the same bed every night and we are not having sex until the wedding. We have taken a lot of crap about living together before marriage and judgment from other Christians.

But when I read the part about others judging, I applied it to my sistuation a little differently. I believe that the Creator of sex designed it to be enjoyed best in its proper context; between a man and women who commit their lives to each other. We commonly call it marriage. And if sleeping in the same bed without sex or sexual activity is achieved, it can still present a probably to others.

sharing a bed with your girlfriend/boyfriend

In high school, I thought I had wanted to wait until marriage. So when I moved in with my then-boyfriend, we slept in the same bed with no sex. My fiance and I are waiting until we are married to have sex but we do live together and sleep in the same bed. There have been a handful of times when the temptation has been really really strong. I think it really depends on the church and especially the denomination.

They base it on the appearance of sin. The more liberal churches and denominations might not see anything wrong with it. Find support, ask questions, swap stories, and follow brides planning real weddings here on Weddingbee.